tell me no, I say yes, I was chosen and I will deliver the explosion

-Santogold

The day has come, as anticipated, when I realize that I miss my old students. Well they are not really mine anymore, never really were mine, but I don't think I could have helped feeling possessive. They were my first students that I taught for a significant amount of time.

What is difficult is that I am in limbo, ready to move on to my next challenge but not being able to. I have to wait for someone to accept what I feel I was made to accomplish, it is incredibly annoying. Now I do not pretend to be in control of my life, because in reality I am not. But I feel that I have a good idea of what I am supposed to do next and it is incredibly frustrating not being able to pursue it. Or rather pursuing my passion, requires that I fill out applications and wait for other people to agree with me.

All I can do these days is talk about what I want to do with my life, what I care about, what I want to change. It is so frustrating because talking about it doesn't change anything. Identifying the problem is an extremely important step in the puzzle, but I'm there and I want to move forward! I am a true college graduate who wants to change the world. A person who is itching to make a difference with the knowledge gained--so let me!

Here is the truth, mid-life crises exist because people settle for not accomplishing their college dreams. People claim they just become realistic and claim that those dreams were just naive idealistic ideas that could never come to fruition. But I say what about the 1960s? What happened when a group of people did not give up their passion for equality and justice? Mountains can move if you believe enough.

"What happens to a dream deferred?

Does it dry up

like a raisin in the sun?

Or fester like a sore--

And then run?

Does it stink like rotten meat?

Or crust and sugar over--

like a syrupy sweet?

Maybe it just sags

like a heavy load.

Or does it explode?"

"A Dream Deferred" - Langston Hughes